Domestic Violence

The Blame Game

The Blame Game

By: arianna suddreth

Last week some Internet hacker jerk “leaked” naked photos of several celebrities. And immediately the Internet lost its collective mind. Because, Internet. Almost as immediate, people started choosing sides. Because, humans.

Ugh. Humans. We are the. worst.

Why are we picking sides here? There should only be one side. Everyone against the hacker that STOLE private photos from citizens of our country and, with malice and no regard for anyone else, shared those most private photos with THE ENTIRE WORLD.

What an asshole.

What infuriates me even more though, is that people started blaming the people in the pictures. Excuse me? How is this their fault?

“They should know better than to take naked selfies.” “They should know that they shouldn’t keep that stuff in the Cloud.” And on and on. It is disgusting.

No. They do not have to ‘know better.’

The person who illegally obtained those private pictures should know better. Because robbery is a CRIME. Even if you do it sitting in a pair of sweatpants in your Mom’s basement.

Victim blaming is huge problem in this country (though not exclusive to America). We always immediately ask what the victim did to bring about the action. THAT’S THE WRONG QUESTION! A rape victim didn’t do anything to say ‘hey, you know what sounds awesome right now, you raping me.’ A domestic abuse victim does not ‘asked to be punched in the head.’ And regardless of how famous a person is, I just don’t think anyone is sitting around at home on the weekend saying, ‘oh man, I really hope somebody hacks into my Cloud and steals the most intimately private pictures I possess and shares them with the entire world.’

This culture we have created is dangerous. It teaches victims, and women in particular, that as a society we don’t really care much about what happens to them. We care infinitely more about what they are doing. As though they are only put on the planet to entertain us. Let me tell you something, I was not put on this Earth to entertain you or anybody else. That is not my purpose. My purpose is to be a good person, to help others when and how I can. But that is not unique to me. We are all here to do those things.

By focusing on the actions of the victim we are losing sight of the fact that they are a victim of a crime. And we are giving more and more power to the criminal all while telling the victim she is not important.

If your sister, or cousin, or girlfriend, or neighbor, or daughter, were the person in the picture would you be sitting on your computer Googling where you can find them? No. Because it would be too real. Too terrible a thing to do. Guess what, though? The people in those pictures are those things to someone. Stop demeaning them into one thing – a naked picture.

Those pictures were not meant for your eyes.

Spend your time doing something more productive – like standing up for the victims.

Let’s stop the blame game. We are all better than that.

#KindnessCanChangeTheWorld. One day at a time.

- Arianna