Modern Manhood, Part III "To Be A Husband"
I am not married. Not even close. Only once have I said to a partner, "I love you." So you can take everything I write here with a grain of salt, but it is my hope that you'll hear me out.
I am no expert, but I know you need more than love to make it. My goal here is not to discount love. I believe it to be humanity's most important element. For relationships to thrive, they require trust, hard work, determination, communication and a hundred other attributes. When men choose to approach love with honesty, love with determination, love with communication... the quality of our relationships are vastly improved, particularly those whom we love forever.
Over the course of a relationship, you will disappoint each other. You will fail. You will come up short. You will find yourself disappointed. Relationships will be made or broken in these moments. So, choose how you react wisely. Don't mask your feelings, but remember to apply context. Your reaction should always fit the crime. Also, don't hold grudges. They will poison your love.
You will possess a love few can understand. Relationships are by their very nature deeply personal. Those on the outside looking in will question what you have or what makes your love work. If it is going well, I imagine you struggling to define it. This is more than fine. This is how it should be. Love is a feeling. When it is right, it is right.
Men, when entering into a relationship, we have to ask ourselves a fundamental question: Can you love something bigger than yourself? If you can't, you aren't ready to be in a relationship. Shake off what society expects from your life and be honest with yourself. When you're ready, you will know it. It will click. You'll look at your partner and think, "I love this person more than myself."
Finally men, faith and hard work will make it last. Committing yourself to another human being is a leap of faith. Beyond the jump, is a requirement to be faithful and work hard at love. Time will test you. It will cast doubt. It will tempt. It will lure. Through all of this, you must stay strong. A forever love is worth that.
Thanks for entering my world,
-Nathan
